True Confession Thursday: Bad Timing

I’m notorious for having the worst timing.

Take, for example, the time I was bowling and stumbled into the bathroom to find a woman struggling to take a poorly executed duck face selfie.  Being the kind person that I am person who wanted to avoid getting publicly humiliated with my horrible bowling skills, I offered to take her picture.

And that’s when it happened.  Duck face in the mirror selfie taker hoisted her leg up onto the bathroom counter showing the whole photo taking audience (hello, at this point it’s me) her thinly veiled bidness.  It was at that VERY moment that the bathroom door swung open and my family and friends poured in.

And there I was, holding a stranger’s camera, taking a picture of this woman who threw me into her very own personal moment.

#badtiming

Last night’s run kept up my bad timing mojo.  I did the mom thing of trying to run during a sports practice.

I started at the park and noticed a big problem – no bathrooms.  No biggie, I peed 20 minutes ago.

Half a mile in, the bottle of water I had just pounded caught up to me.  I started running up and downhill at a sub 7-minute mile pace with 3 thoughts running through my head:

1- My well woman visit the day before where the doctor asked about post-preganancy incontinence (yes 9 years to the day later) and I blew it off saying, “It’s pretty much under control.”  Which was basically the biggest liary of lies ever.  My traumatic first childbirth wreaked havoc on my bladder and still

2-  I lamented every stoplight that I have ever, ever sat at without doing any Kegel’s and wished horrible things upon the weakness of my pelvic floor.

3- A vision of my pink Dear Kates hanging on the drying rack instead of being plastered on my butt where they should have been at that very moment sparing me from the ever increasing likelihood of a football practice pickup with a shirt tied around my waist.  I still LOVE, LOVE, LOVE these bad boys.

The duds, and they’re certainly dapper!

A few miles in I found an unsuspecting coffee shop and my bladder contracted in relief…until I noticed the “Open” sign was off and they were closed.  *whimper*

With the clock ticking closer and closer to practice ending and my superior chauffeuring services being in timely need, I blazed into the next shop – a nail salon.  (eh, desperate times, desperate measures)

Breathlessly I squeaked out…..”Can I please use your bathroom?”.

The woman pointed towards the back and nodded yes while everyone else in the salon glared at me and muttered what I can only assume were really kind things like, “Wow, kudos to her for squeezing a workout in!” and “I love those running shoes!“.

My bladder did a happy dance at the sight of the porcelain throne, I barreled out of there promising to return someday to get what is left of my toenails prettified.

I sprinted the last 1.5 miles back to practice in time to watch a few minutes of practice before dragging the bambinos home for dinner.

The good news:  due to the bad timing, I had a fabulous hilly run with good times, even if my bladder will never forgive me.

What’s the worst timing you’ve had lately?

What’s the weirdest place you’ve stopped to use the bathroom on a run?

The Bee’s Knees

Yesterday I finally, finally, finally got to do a double digit run.

Yes I spent some time flirting with a bunch of 9’s, but I haven’t hit it off with a 10+ since last November.

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Dear Back Bay, I love you *THIS* much. Love, Me

Take that legs.

Actually, it seemed my body and nature were doing everything they could to rain on my parade (okay not literal rain, this is SoCal I’m not quite sure I know what that rain stuff actually is), but I pushed through.

Saturday night food allergy reaction kept me up a bulk as it felt like I had swallowed 1,000 angry kittens who were working their way through my GI tract.  My gut left me with a late start meaning I got to run in peak SoCal “spring” heat.  While I love the 80’s when it comes to music, it’s just not overly awesome to run in.

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Rocks tried to trip me (no seriously rolled off a face plant in front of a bunch of people, Mary Lou Retton would have been proud) and a giant swarm of thousands of bees tried to keep me from finishing, but alas my legs won.

Post-run cool down/cross training with some paddle boarding and then…. well…as all good things do end – carbs, pink sauce & red wine.

IMG_6084What are your challenges to getting miles in lately?

Have you ever seen an angry swarm of thousands of bees?
It’s seriously frightening…like low blood sugar 2 year old before nap time terrifying.

True Confession Thursday: Louse-y Week

Let’s have a little talk about honesty.  Yes, honesty.

When a mom says, “I kinda lost it with my kids a bit this afternoon.” [this happened the other day]

Kinda lost it roughly translates to – I locked myself in my bathroom after totally coming unglued.  I want to know why we aren’t really honest with one another?

Because my car NEVER looks like this....

Because my car NEVER looks like this….

In the spirit of honesty, life hasn’t been a lot of sunshine and rainbows coming out my…well you know where.

There are seasons when parenting is awesome and fun and so deeply fulfilling I can hardly believe that I get the opportunity to do it.  And then you realize your wine glass is empty and someone realizes they forgot to do a project due TOMORROW at 8am.

But seriously, despite the normal ups and downs we’ve had a few things going on with the boys (one in particular) and it’s been challenging to say the least.  The emotional, physical and even spiritual energy suck that has happened has meant a total revamp on life & what I spend time doing.

This all peaked last week when things got pretty louse-y.  It was slightly irritating and really bugged me, but one of the I realized one of the boys didn’t get the “Share hugs, not bugs” memo, the latter part of my entire week meant cleaning, treating lice.  Yes, I too joined the ranks of egg head joining in the infectious fun.

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Lice be gone…

I’m not going to nit pick or anything, but cleaning took up all of the spare time we had, so running was off the grid.  Once we were properly deloused and officially lice free, we opted to enjoy a little staycation which included a SURPRISE 10k.

Enter Grunion Run 10k.

A surprise race….shockingly soggy….and a second place sweep.

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I don’t look wet but I’m actually soaked.

I’ll spare you details on the pretty standard race other than it was rainy, I ran 45:05 and came in 2nd overall finish for women.  But it was quite the learning experience, which can pretty much be summed up by the spirit of Jock Jams.

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Bringing happiness and the running man to my house since 1995.

Let’s Get Ready To Rumble:  Let’s face it, sometimes you walk into a race with your game face prepped and ready to roll.  You do everything right – sleep, diet, training and the race just doesn’t pan out.  Other times you can push through the mile 2 dry heaving (hey, so maybe wine tasting, free champagne at the hotel and a heavy dinner aren’t a great idea the night before a race) and feel great after.  For me, I never know which it’s going to be, so I just always have to be ready to rumble.

It Takes Two (hundred):  While DJ EZ Rock thought it took two to make a thing go right, I found it’s actually 200 for me.  The last few weeks my runs have focused on my cadence [not familiar with this concept, read here].  During this race and  I finally found a number that just felt oh so right: 200.  I’ve typically been running around 170ish thus aggravating my back and jacking everything up the last few years.  But as I’ve slowly increased my cadence I have worked on a shorter stride with a strong mid-foot strike feels oh so right in all the right places and hanging in my happy place around 200.

Whoomp! There It is:  While big, highly organized races are fun and there’s a huge buzz about them, there is something amazing about small, local races.  I love watching the families participate, showing up 15 minutes before the race starts.  Turnout was low because it was raining (note: California breeds weather weenies).

Gonna Make You Sweat:  Nah, not much to say about this other than the fact that it’s STILL my favorite running song decades later when I need a little extra oomph in the middle of a long run or race.

What’s your favorite Jock Jam?

What tune gets your feet shuffling when you run?